Stress... So... High...
Jesus.


For School I need:
(2)Transcripts from ACC and State
(x) Fafsa
(x) application

For work I need
(1000000) applications
(1000000) Copies of my updated resume
(x) Update Resume

Moving I need
( ) Cleaning
( ) Packing
( ) Moving Junk on July 25th to San Antonio
( ) Moving important things on August 20th
(100000) boxes

Emotionally I need
(10 or so) Pints of ice cream, will settle for blizzards.
(6) hours to watch Star wars, seriously though.
(1) man who will watch Star Wars/No Reservations with me.
(1) Vacation from stress.

WHAT UPPPPP

Alright! Officially moving to San Antonio.
Kinda scared, kind of excited.
HEY listen to my friends DEMO

http://nicolebueno.bandcamp.com/album/spaceblazer

Also- I'm making a video of all of my favorite memories with Cam and Brandon since I'm moving. SHOULD BE CUTE.

Optimism

So yesterday I was feeling pretty pessimistic about how things had been going lately. Right now I'm feeling better about everything. I had a good conversation with my mom about school and my housing situation for the fall.

Its amazing what a good nights sleep and some coffee will do.

PLAN OF ATTACK (San Antonio)
Take a semester to up my GPA and retake the classes I made D's in.
Reapply to UTSA for the spring.
Go to UTSA and finish my degree.
Apply with Carnival Cruise lines and work in their camp program for a year.

PLAN OF ATTACK (Austin)
Take a semester to up my GPA and retake classes I made D's in.
Reapply to St.Edwards for the spring
Go to St.Edwards and finish my degree.
Apply with various school districts in the Austin/San Antonio area.


WHILE working on my professional life I will:
Quit dating boys for the sake of dating and start saving myself for someone REALLY worth it.
Start investing myself in things that really matter.
Dance, learn guitar, swim, write, and photograph EVERYTHING.
Save money! (1,000 by Christmas!)

I want a puppy too, but that will be for after I'm done with school. Until then I have Jet!

Medium Raw

So I'm reading Anthony Bourdain's book/memoir/cautionary tale Medium Raw. I am a firm believer in foul language, bad choices, and living life to its fullest. His book was making me want to write. Especially with his conversational form of writing I noticed myself having conversations with myself inside my head.

Right now I have no idea where my life will be in a month. I'm at such a crossroads and I can't figure out what to do. Can't live on my own, can't move home. I'm in life limbo with the Swank's looking forward to a consistent paycheck and being out of debt. At 22 I'm single and kind of dissatisfied with the terrible choices I've made in the past. I was never a drug user or an alcoholic. The one thing I abused was my bank account and maybe my love for entertaining. I have tattoos, both have a story and purpose. I have a nose ring, something rather insignificant in my world of musicians and artists. I'm not particularly careless... except with my loud mouth and need to say things that don't need to be said. I use boys as an excuse to be heartbroken, although every guy I break up with ends up with someone more well rounded and less crazy than me.

I need a purpose and stability. I'm a thinker and a creative soul, but I'm out of ideas at this point. I'm one phone call away from either moving in with mom or dad... Austin or San Antonio...

I need some guidance. Some parenting I missed out on...

I guess I'm trying to figure out what is wrong with me that I haven't found a certain level of contentment yet. Maybe I'm over analyzing- AGAIN!
Maybe I'll feel better after the phone call.